It gets better. Really, it does. Now that my kids are teens, they help out with the laundry and the cooking. Let your kids "help" you cook. It's a life skill they need, and it will make your life easier in the long run. Same thing with chores - unloading the dishwasher is pretty simple for 4 year olds, as long as you put plates and bowls in cabinets they can reach.
My #1 hint - lower your standards at home. Clean enough is not "white glove test" clean.
When you find a recipe that is easy and quick, print it out and keep it in a binder. It doesn't have to be a gourmet meal from scratch every night. Taco Tuesday, using Penzey's Taco Seasoning, is lovely. Frozen veggies are awesome. They make frozen stir-fry veggies, which make pulling together a leftover dinner quick.
Celebrate Fridays with pizza - homemade, or frozen, or delivery. No work for the cook, and use paper plates.Then stream a movie for "forced family fun."
If you and your partner both have off weekends, split sleep-in days.Sleep is a necessity, not a luxury.
Some "problems" are Visa problems. Solve them. Spend extra $ for wrinkle-free shirts, pay a babysitter once a month, even if you just take a walk, or a nap. One of our kids needed me to be in his room to fall asleep, so we got a recliner for his room. Sleeping in it was better than being awake, waiting for him to fall asleep.
Be kind to yourself. If you need help, prioritize that time, whether it's therapy time, or daily walks, or a gym class. Take a mental health day if you need one, and stay home alone. Don't feel like you have to keep the kids home from daycare if you are home. Sometimes, you are a better parent for your time away.
Each community has resources - https://springfieldmoms.org/ is ours, and they list support groups. Look for your lists. https://springfieldmoms.org/?cat=7&tag=support-groups+support-groups
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Carolyn Pointer (she/hers)
Associate Professor
Southern Illinois University School of Medicine
cpointer49@siumed.eduOpinions my own.
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Original Message:
Sent: 03-11-2025 11:01:01 AM
From: Stephanie Weiner
Subject: Let's Talk Parental Mental Health: How Do You Find Balance?
Hi everyone, I know I'm a little late to the conversation, but I just came across International Parental Mental Health Awareness Week (March 6-12), and it really resonated with me-especially some of the statistics around stress. As a working parent, I've certainly felt the weight of balancing career and family, and I know I'm not alone.
Since 2020, nearly half of parents (48%) have reported increased stress levels, and 75% of people said they could have used more emotional support than they received. These numbers really hit home, and they highlight why it's so important to check in on ourselves and each other.
I thought the Academic Medicine Open Forum community could be a great space to share parenting "hacks," resources, or strategies that help us maintain balance in stressful times. How do you show up for your family while also taking care of yourself? Whether it's time management tricks, support systems that have made a difference, or just words of encouragement-we can all benefit from learning from each other.
Drop your thoughts, resources, or experiences in the comments.
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Stephanie Weiner
Portfolio Director II, Communications & Marketing
Association of American Medical Colleges
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